Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
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