me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
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