I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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