if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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