let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
