So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
