i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
