Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
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