...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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