I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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