I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
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