How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
