Midget sex pt 2 tonight
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize