we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
