Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
