We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
