and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
you didnt know i had herpes?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I need a beard to bite.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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