just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
