Do you still have your period?
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
