its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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