I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize
