You just made me feel so damn special
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
