Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
