How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize