I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm sobbing to NWA
Randomize