I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize