Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize