Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
