Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
