i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
