You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
