So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize