I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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