saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
