Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize
