She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
i drank out of a bidet.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
