but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
