This girl is more easily done than said...
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
