I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Just high enough for therapy.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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