is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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