Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
