I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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