So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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