I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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