after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
