I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
