look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
