Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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