sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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