Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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