My brain says no but my pants say off.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
