Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
