Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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